Orgy of the Dead (1965)

Imagine going to a strip club in 1965 during Halloween and the whole place is decorated with fake cobwebs and plastic vampire bats from your local 99 cent store.  This is Orgy of the Dead.

I almost didn’t write a review on this because after watching, I realized that it wasn’t even close to being about zombies.  The busty characters are supposedly dead and there is one who they even call a “zombie”, though you would never know had they not said anything.  Dancing topless with your arms stretched out in front of you is hardly a qualification for being a zombie.

The plot, if you want to call it that, consists of a young couple driving to a graveyard for the purposes of being inspired to write a good horror story (ohhh the irony).  The couple soon find themselves in trouble when the dude crashes his car for no apparent reason.  Now, stranded in the cemetery, hiding in the bushes, the couple decide to stick around and watch the emperor of darkness summon naked dead women to dance for his entertainment.

For awhile the couple get several good strip shows, including a chick dressed in a fury cat suit and another that is turned into solid gold, until the worst renditions of the Wolf Man and the Mummy happen to capture them.  Yea that’s right, the Wolf Man and the Mummy!!  Don’t fret though, as this doesn’t interfere with the emperor of darkness’ plan to bore us with more long dance scenes.  He just has the couple loosely tied to two conveniently placed wooden posts and forces them to watch the girls’ jumblies for the rest of the movie.

To say that this is a B horror movie is to massively overate it, as it falls far short of being considered campy, even on an unintentional level.  Unlike other bad zombie movies where you can at least have fun by making fun of them, Orgy of the Dead simply makes your eyes want to puke their guts out.

It is an Ed Wood film, so yes, I understand it’s really more about the sexploitation and naked boobies, which I certainly appreciate, however it still falls short even for an Ed Wood film!  And the sole redeeming quality of the film, copious amounts of jiggling tits, gets boring after 90 minutes of it.  Seriously, that’s the entire movie, naked girls dancing in a shitty graveyard.

That’s it, that’s your zombie movie.